Obama stressed the need of giving young boys access to a variety of male role models outside of their fathers during a recent appearance on the show. He emphasized the special role LGBTQ friends may play in setting an example of kindness and empathy, traits he feels are critical to developing well-rounded young men.

“Even if a guy is an excellent father, boys need more than simply exposure to one male. Obama remarked, “He can’t be everything,” recalling his early interactions with Michelle’s extended family and the various manifestations of masculinity he saw there.

Obama remembered how an out gay professor who was one of his favorite instructors in college helped him grow emotionally and challenged his preconceptions. He acknowledged that his sense of empathy and the importance of inclusive viewpoints in male friendships were shaped by those encounters.

“You need that person in your friend group,” he stated. “So that if you have a boy who’s gay or non-binary or whatever, they have someone to look to and think, ‘Okay, I’m not alone in this.’”

Obama encouraged fathers to help their kids develop a more inclusive sense of community that values representation and emotional intelligence. Additionally, he noted that progressive places have occasionally placed a strong emphasis on assisting girls while inadvertently ignoring the concerns of guys.

“As progressive parents, we’ve sometimes made the mistake of only talking about what’s wrong with boys, instead of highlighting what’s right with them,” he stated. “That’s been a mistake, and I think people are beginning to realize that.”

“I hope that today’s young men are starting to redefine masculinity in healthier, more inclusive ways,” the former president said. However, he advised against completely abandoning traditional ideals, pointing out that some facets of “old school” men, including duty and gallantry, are still valuable.